Better than Caffeine
by BlackRoseDragonCK
Summary: Oneshot. It was a dark, stormy night in the Castle. All Axel wanted to do was go to bed. Then, Xion appeared, looking scared. "Axel, there's a weird noise coming from the hall outside my room. "It's probably just Xaldin. He may have a silver tongue when he's awake but he sounds like gravel in a blender when he sleeps." "It's not snoring...it's scary." Humor/akushi friendship.


**I DO NOT OWN KINGDOM HEARTS**

**Hello there :)! In spite of its suspenseful beginning, this is NOT a Halloween fic. It is actually based on something that happened to me once…something that was scary at the time but is funny when I look back on it XD. The story takes place during the time when Axel and Xion were becoming friends before she got her Keyblade back. There is Akushi friendship in this. Please enjoy :D!**

**X**

"The next time I see Saix I'm gonna wring his neck…" Axel grumbled. "I know he's basically a werewolf and all…but some of us actually like to get some sleep around here."

Normally, a statement like this muttered in so sullen a tone would have been strange for the Flurry of Dancing Flames. Was he typically cheery? Yes. A smart aleck? Of course. Did he enjoy aggravating the living daylights out of his elders? Every day.

Tonight, however, his mood had dropped to an ultimate low. This was because he was exhausted, having been sent on one of those confounded Unidentified Giant Heartless missions in Halloween Town. It had been a Carrier Ghost, a Heartless that sapped the very energy from its victims. Now, after an unpleasant fight, he was stuck writing a stupidly long report for Saix, recording every minute, insignificant detail he could recall. The mundane work combined with fatigue severely tested Axel's patience. It was a well-known fact among Organization XIII that Number VIII was rather volatile when plagued by lack of sleep.

Slouched on one of the Grey Rooms cold, uncomfortable couches, the redhead stared dully down at the paper on the coffee table before him. The massive wall of windows lay to his side, revealing the stormy night. Icy rain poured from the heavens, accompanied by flashes of lightning and crashes of thunder.

Axel chewed on the tip of his pen, striving to keep his acid-green eyes from dragging closed. He forced himself to look at the words he had written. _"The Heartless dwelled among one of the darkest graveyards Halloween Town has to offer. It had golden eyes, a black, wispy body, jagged teeth, and a murderous disposition."_

Number VIII struggled to focus…but the rain was so soothing. It gave off a relaxing sound that made his thin, black-clad body feel heavier by the second. He leaned his cheek on his hand…his eyes eased shut…his breathing slowed…the pen slipped from his fingers…

"AXEL!"

Axel yelped and nearly fell off the sofa. At first, he didn't register whose voice it was. His mind automatically imagined an irritable, verging-on-berserk Saix who was ticked off at him for slacking on his reports.

Scrambling to sit up, Axel shouted, "I'm awake! I'm awake! Please don't give me a Leech Grave mission!"

But…it wasn't the Luna Diviner who had called to him. Instead, Xion stood several feet away. Her cloak was wrinkled, her hair sticking in many different directions. The girl had clearly been in bed, yet her sapphire eyes were not bleary. Instead, they were wide, perhaps the widest puppy-dog eyes Axel had ever seen.

Number VIII tilted his head concernedly. "What's wrong?"

Xion wound her arms tightly around her abdomen. Her normally bright expression was dark with fear. Axel new is well as anyone that Nobodies were not supposed to feel any emotions…but Xion and Roxas had always been different from the others. He was therefore worried to see her in such a state.

Xion approached the arm of the couch, her petite form trembling slightly. "Axel…there's a really weird noise coming from the hall outside my room."

"Weird noise?" Axel smirked, his worry lessening. "It's probably just Xaldin. He may have a silver tongue when he's awake…but when he sleeps, he sounds like gravel in a blender."

Number XIV shook her raven-colored locks. "No, it's not snoring. It's…I can't even describe it it's so horrible…" her voice shook slightly. "Will you please come investigate it with me?"

She bit her lip, wringing her gloved fingers. Axel studied her. Waves of guilt which should have had no effect on his supposedly hollow core nagged at him. He didn't want to tarnish his tough reputation…but he supposed he could excuse his actions by saying he had been concerned for the girl because she could not wield her Keyblade at the moment. On the assumption that there was indeed something dangerous stalking the castle halls, he could claim that he hadn't wanted to risk losing yet another member of their already lacking group. It might have been a lame argument…but it was better than admitting that he had a soft spot for her as well as Roxas.

Sighing, Axel swung his long legs off the couch. He ran a hand through his shock of crimson hair, smiling crookedly. "All right. Let's pay this 'boogie man' a visit."

Xion gave him a smile that stripped yet another layer from his supposedly "emotionless" status. "Thank you," she murmured, taking his hand and leading him down the shadowed hallway.

As they walked, Axel had to admit that the castle was rather creepy during turbulent nights such as these. Normally, he would be blissfully sprawled on his bed and snoring at this time. Now, he was getting the chance to see what things really looked like when night fell upon the Castle that Never Was.

The corridors, almost all of which looked exactly the same, were filled with darkness. The only reason Axel could see an inch in front of his face was because of the faint neon tubing that ran through sections of the pale metal walls. Their footsteps echoed through the eerily silent halls. It reminded him of the cemetery he had described in his report…

Number VIII shook the thought away. His eyes scanned every crevice, searching for whatever it was that had spooked Xion. So far, he saw nothing…heard nothing. Only their footsteps and soft breathing pierced the palpable quiet. Then…Xion grabbed hold of his arm, her body trembling once more.

"Do you hear that?" she whispered.

Axel listened. At first, he heard nothing. Upon further concentration…the din reached his years, soft…but distinct.

Echoing from around the next corner was a strange howling noise. As they drew closer, Axel could hear other sounds synchronized with the wailing. There was a horrid screaming…and most dominantly, a high-pitched, wicked, ghoulish laughter.

Halting at the corner, the redhead peered cautiously into the hall beyond. The way was partially let by fluorescent tubing…but it was mostly drowned in foreboding darkness. He could make out nothing after the first several yards.

For an instant, the wailing, shrieking, cackling noise halted. Axel frowned. He craned his neck farther forward, wondering if he had imagined it. Right as he had let his guard down and was about to venture into the corridor…the sound started up again, louder and creepier than ever.

Axel jumped and cursed under his breath. Whimpering, Xion pressed close to his side. "What is it?"

"I don't know," said he, eyes narrowing. "But it sounds like it's coming from that supply closet down there."

Axel was more than a little reluctant to move. But…he couldn't act as though he were scared. He would allow Xion to be afraid since she was unique as far as Nobodies went…but he was not permitted that luxury. He did have his reputation to think of, after all.

Taking a deep breath, Number VIII crossed the threshold into the corridor. He made his way down the dark passage, Xion clinging to his arm all the way. With each faltering step they took, the beastly sounds grew louder. They were definitely originating from the castle's largest supply closet.

The duo halted in front of the metallic door. The laughing was far less muffled now and almost hurt his ears. Xion had such a tight grip on his arm that he was convinced she would cut off the circulation. Even in the dark, he could see her round, petrified eyes. He suddenly remembered something.

"Shouldn't you have a weapon of some sort?" Axel asked, knowing that she still could not summon her Keyblade.

The girl's eyes further widened, if that were even possible. "Oh…I didn't think of that."

She teleported away. Axel frowned, perplexed. Whatever was haunting the closet gave another wail and he jerked. He suddenly wished that Xion hadn't left him there alone…even though she was a girl half his size.

Moments later, Number XIV returned. She brandished a kitchen knife as big as her forearm and a somewhat more confident expression.

"Ready?"

Axel shrugged. "Be my guest," he said, gesturing toward the door.

Xion balked. She looked at the door, then at him. Her mouth opened and closed a few times before she found her voice. "I…I have to go first…?"

"It's your monster," he laughed, eyes glittering mischievously. "Besides…it's dark in there and you're the living flashlight in this group. Got it memorized?"

"I…" Xion wrung her hands anxiously. "…I-I…"

"If you didn't want to go first then why didn't you go get Roxas? He wields light just like you do. He could've gone."

The girl's cheeks seemed to darken in color. She was blushing. "He was fast asleep. I didn't want to wake him up…"

"And…?"

"…and…I didn't think Roxas…I didn't think he could…"

Axel raised his eyebrows, following her thought. "You didn't think he'd be strong enough to face whatever is behind this door?"

Xion's flush deepened and she bowed her head. "I just…feel safer with you around…" she murmured.

Axel blinked, momentarily stunned. Then, a smile curled his lips. He shouldn't have been surprised. He had become a guardian of sorts for the Organization's two Keyblade wielders. Even so…it somehow contented him to know that they valued his presence. It was far more than his comrades at Castle Oblivion had ever done.

"I'm so flattered," Axel grinned, ruffling the girl's obsidian tresses. "All right then. Shine your light inside the closet and take a look. I'll be right here if anything 'unsavory' leaps out."

Xion gazed into his face for a moment. She took a deep breath and nodded slowly. A golden glow gradually spread across her form, making her look like some sort of apparition in the shadows. It added decent illumination to their immediate surroundings. Gingerly grasping the knob, she turned it…and gave the door a quick tug. It creaked open. The ominous laughing ceased for a moment.

Xion frowned. Brandishing the knife, she stepped into the door frame. Nothing happened. She progressed further into the closet until her companion could no longer see her.

"Huh…" her voice resounded from within. "I don't see anythi—"

She was cut off by a hair-raising howl. Axel heard a clatter, followed by Xion's piercing shriek. The pyro tensed and started to summon his chakrams…but his raven-haired friend came stumbling out of the room before he had the chance. She slammed the door shut and pressed her back against it, panting heavily.

"I-I-It's d-definitely in there," she stammered, sapphire eyes gargantuan.

Axel grunted, folding his arms over his chest. "The question is…WHAT is in there?"

They both thought for a moment. Then…Axel noticed that something was missing from Xion's person. He slowly unfolded his arms and looked her up and down. "Xion…where's the knife?"

All color drained from Xion's pretty face. Her expression changed from thoughtful to utterly horrified. Reluctantly, her eyes swiveled to look at the door against which she leaned. "I…think I dropped it when I ran out of there."

As if to verify this statement, the entity let out a particularly demonic laugh. Axel sighed heavily, rubbing his eyes and the teardrop-shaped tattoos beneath them. "Great…now IT has a weapon."

Xion moaned and slid down to the cold floor. She grabbed handfuls of her hair, as if intending to tear it out. "Ugh, what are we gonna do?" she then brightened and asked, "Axel, you can still wield your weapon. Why don't you use your fire to illuminate the closet? In fact…now that I think about it, you could have done that before…so why did you make me go first?"

She stood up, eyes narrowed fiercely. She looked like she was ready to pummel her elder friend. Axel couldn't help but laugh at the tiny female, who, striving to look ferocious, came across ridiculously cute instead.

"I already considered that option," he explained, smirking. "Then I recalled that it was Demyx's job to organize this supply closet…which means it's about as disorganized as it could possibly get. Who knows what kind of flammable junk is stocked in there. Unless you wanna go up in flames along with whatever is in there, I wouldn't suggest that particular course of action."

The girl deflated. She hung her head, thinking for a few seconds. Sighing, she stood upright. Her face hardened with determination. "It's my own fault that I no longer have a weapon. I'll deal with it."

The glow overtook her slight form once more. Swallowing visibly, she opened the door again and vanished into it. Though he strove to ignore the nagging sensation, Axel couldn't help but be a bit concerned. He stuck his head around the door frame, just in case she needed him.

The laughing had started up once again but nothing had revealed itself. Xion stood about halfway within the room, the blade in her hand once again. Thankfully, the wicked entity hadn't stolen it. She made her way deeper among the clutter…and Axel couldn't help reflecting on what it had been like to wander through those droves of gravestones. It sent a shiver down his spine.

"_Stupid Halloween Town…"_ he thought.

"Hey…"

Xion's voice snapped him from his recollection. He refocused on her and saw that she was standing over a spare Organization cloak crumpled on the floor. The howling seemed to be coming from beneath it. The girl glanced at him questioningly. Axel nodded and flexed his fingers, ready to summon his chakrams at a moment's notice.

Clutching her weapon tightly, Xion took a deep breath…and snatched the article away. She cringed…Axel tensed…and they both stared blankly at what they saw.

It was indeed a ghoul that had been making the awful racket…but it was made of neither black magic nor a reanimated corpse. It was made of plastic.

"…Say what?" was all the dumbfounded pyro could grind out.

Brows furrowing, Xion picked up the object, It featured a plastic pirate skull with vampiric teeth and clawed, bony hands. The skull and hands were connected by strips of red and black fabric, making its body look ghostly. Each of those pieces were suspended from a long tube containing a speaker…the source of the ungodly noise.

Both Organization members gawked at the thing. Later, Axel didn't even remember how he'd gotten from the doorway to Xion's side. He had been so fixated on the rather ludicrous source of their worry.

"What IS this?" Xion finally asked, glancing at her companion with a look of utter bewilderment.

It took him a moment to remember. When he did, he ran a hand through his hair in exasperation. "I forgot about this thing…Xigbar bought it in Halloween Town one year as a prank. He hid it in Saix's room one time. I figured Saix had gone berserk and destroyed it after that…but apparently, it just got filed away with the rest of the junk."

The thing shrieked and cackled in response to that statement. Xion gave it a wary look. "Well…how do we turn it off?"

Axel examined the section containing the shrieking speaker from all angles. It took him a moment, but he eventually laid eyes on a switch. Rather than reading "On/Off", however…it was imprinted with, "Demo/Sensor". Currently, the device was on "Sensor" mode.

"It's set on a motion detector," the redhead thought aloud "If I change it to the other setting it shouldn't go off unless I press this toggle button…"

He pointed out the aforementioned button. The creature howled and snickered for a hundredth time, making Xion jump. "Please make it stop," she pleaded.

Axel gave his most charming smile. "Your wish is my command," he said, flicking the switch to 'Demo'."

Instantly, the noise stopped. Xion stared at it for a long moment before her face lit up with a bright smile. "Finally! Thank you, Axel!"

"No problem," the pyro replied as he carelessly tossed the thing aside. It landed in a heap on the floor.

The two started out of the closet, an air of triumph surrounding them. In spite of their victory, however…something was bothering Axel. If the Halloween decoration was set on the motion detector option, it should have only gone off in the presence of movement. Nothing had been moving around in the closet…at least he hoped nothing was moving in there.

"Phew…" Xion smiled up at her friend. "…glad that's over wi…"

The horrendous cackling returned in all its nightmarish fury. Both Organization agents halted and whipped around, eyes wide in shock.

"I thought you turned the motion sensor off!" Xion exclaimed.

"I did!" Axel shot back.

Number XIV paled again. She gawked at the creature which still laughed tauntingly at them. Going to stand over it, she murmured, "Maybe we should take the batteries out. Do you see a screwdriver anywhere?"

Axel looked around the room, dark save for the soft glow radiating from Xion. He saw stacks of paper, office supplies, canned food, spare Organization cloaks, cleaning chemicals, vials of potentially deadly substances (some of which were probably flammable), dilapidated bits of machinery, and countless bottles of hair gel. None of these items were placed in any particular order thanks to the lazy Melodious Nocturne.

After a brief scan of the chaotically-arranged supplies, Number VIII eventually sighted a screwdriver. Working together, he and Xion attempted to open the battery cover on the cursed skeleton. The screw remained stubbornly stagnant, from rust or excessive tightening Axel was not sure.

Growling in frustration, he set down the tool and glowered at their problem. It merely stared back at him with its empty eyes, yowling all the while.

"M-maybe the demo setting is broken and it only r-runs on the motion detector n-now…" stuttered Xion with obvious fear creeping back into her voice.

"Mmm…" Axel's brows furrowed. "…let's try this then."

He snatched the coat and crammed it over the monster, as if intending to smother it. He then grabbed Xion's hand and dashed out of the closet. Slamming the door shut, he and the black-haired girl held it closed with their backs. The ghoul's screeching reached them even through the cold metal.

"That freakin' thing is possessed," Axel hissed…though there was a slight cracking his voice that revealed how disturbed he truly was.

Clutching tightly to his hand, Xion said, "Why don't you just burn it to a crisp?"

"If I do that, we'll never hear the end of it. Xigbar'll make us go all the way to Halloween Town and scour every creepy shop there until we find another one to replace it. Being Number II in the Organization does have it advantages."

Xion whimpered, burying her face in his arm. The creature continued its infernal chortling and baying. Axel could almost swear that it sounded louder than it had before. The duo stood in silence, daring to neither breathe nor move as the beast audibly tormented them.

Then…the soft-spoken Keyblade wielder's countenance darkened. At first, the redhead thought that she was flushing from embarrassment. Just as he was opening her mouth to tell her that this situation was in no way her fault…she released him and shot what could only be described as a "death glare" toward the door. Involuntarily, Axel took a step away from the closet. He raised his eyebrows.

"Uh…Xion? You okay?"

The girl did not answer. Instead…she strode back into the closet and commenced digging through the various piles of junk. Her enemy continued to taunt her but she no longer seemed afraid. On the contrary…every mocking cackle seemed to make her flush grow a shade darker. After several moments of scouring, Xion produced what she was looking for…a wooden rolling pin.

She strode right over to the skeleton, tossed aside the cloak, and commenced beating the daylights out of her foe with the cooking utensil. For awhile, Axel could only stand there and watch, paralyzed in a mixture of shock and amusement. Never had he imagined that his small, quiet friend could go berserk like this.

"_Huh…mental note to self, don't EVER tick her off,"_ the pyro thought, striding forward.

The ghoul lay crumpled and dented yet unbroken on the ground. Axel had a feeling that it wouldn't stay that way much longer beneath Xion's relentless assault.

Catching her pin-bearing arm, he told her, "Whoooooa, easy there," he grinned at her. "We don't want ya to wear out your Heartless-slaying arm on a plastic Halloween decoration. Got it memorized?"

Xion's eyelashes fluttered. This time, she did blush from embarrassment. Setting aside her kitchen weapon, she wrung her hands and smiled sheepishly.

"Uh…sorry…"

"Don't be," said the pyro, digging through the rubbish for his screwdriver. "I think you might have knocked the screw loose."

Minutes later, they had pried away the battery cover and ripped out the power source. Axel dangled the limp, now lifeless demon, smirking at his companion.

"Will you do the honors?"

Xion nodded vigorously. "With pleasure."

She grabbed the thing and stuffed as deeply as she could into the messy void that was the closet. She crammed clothing and boxes and other less identifiable things on top of it, making sure that it could never be accessed without substantial difficulty. The girl then yawned and rubbed her eyes, looking as if she would fall asleep standing upright.

"All right," Axel smirked, ruffling her hair. "Get to bed so you don't sleep through your mission tomorrow."

"'Kay…" she replied sleepily.

Trudging toward her bedroom, she stopped before opening the door. "Goodnight, Axel," she smiled sweetly. "And thanks for helping me with that thing. I owe you one…"

"Buy me an ice cream and we'll call it even," he grinned back at her. "G'night, Xion."

He watched as she vanished into the welcoming darkness of her room. Then, he started down the hall toward the Grey Room where his report lay waiting to be completed. In reality…he felt as if HE were the one in debt. After all, he had been ready to fall asleep on the couch and too lazy to retrieve some sort of caffeine. The mini adventure with Xion had woken him up. It sent a burst of adrenaline through his lanky form that was far more powerful than coffee or soda.

Plopping down on the couch, Number VIII proceeded to complete the necessary description and battle information sections of his report. He progressed with considerable rapidness…but faltered when he reached the title of the final section.

"'Important Message or Intel Learned During Mission'…" Axel frowned at the piece of paper. "Seriously Saix? Ugh….."

He tugged at a strand of his fire-red hair, racking his brain for a response. There had been no incidents or pieces of information on his previous mission. It wasn't like learning of the hidden cave in Agrabah or the mystic rose in Beast's Castle…

"All I did was go in, fight the Heartless, and get the heck out of Ghoulville as fast as possible…" the young man grumbled.

Then, he brightened suddenly. He had indeed learned something imperative today. It had been during a mission…just not the one in Halloween Town. Scribbling down his response, Axel made a mental note to thank Xion for inadvertently helping him through his report. He then filed it, went back to his room, and fell into a deep, coma-like slumber.

The next morning, Saix's already dour expression further darkened when he came upon the last sentence in Axel's report. "Important Message or Intel Learned During Mission... 'always take the batteries out of cheap Halloween decorations before packing them away with the rest of your junk'…?"

Number VII pondered this odd statement for a good five minutes. He then sighed in defeat, mumbling, "Maybe I should take that section out of the report rubric…"

**X**

**Why was the Halloween decoration constantly going off? I have no idea, either in real life or in this story XDDDD. Anyways, I hope you liked and please review :)! Please no flames.**

**I DO NOT OWN KINGDOM HEARTS**


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